to: you know who you are.

just when I thought I finally got it, i totally fucked up again.I clearly didnt mean anything by it, I clearly cant take in jokes nor can i give one. Im an epic fail at that. Im sorry for everything. I dont deserve these past few days. you were the best and I was a bitch, I understand how you feel. I will just dissapear and it will just be like everything that happened never did. I think its better that way, i know you'll hate me forever, and i deserve it. so thank you for everything, i really appreciate it. Il love and miss you, bye.

goodbye summer !

It seemed like my summer just started and ended right when it was just getting better.
Tomorrow , or today I will leave San Francisco for LA and will officially end summer right when the plane lifts off .. Omy. why am i being so overly dramatic -__- maybe its because Im dreading school, cliche` i know, who wants school in the first place? besides, i wasnt ready to leave this amazing bed Im currently sleeping at for my small dingy one. But then again, I miss my mother, boyfriend, myrussellookalikecousinnamednhoele and my grandmama.
However, I will surely miss my family here, they took time to teach me how to drive, "thank goodness for life insurances" - kuya noel ha ha . I didnt run over a person ! but i did run over a red light , sigh* it was ALMOST perfect. they also fed my enormous appetite with great resturants and cooking and took me places, camwhored with me, watched the meteor shower along adam's driveway and almost got attacked by a bobcat, and took me to ride an elephant! an elephant !! i totally felt like Princess Jasmine from Alladin ! hahaha , shut up. I've always wanted to ride an elephant named after my favorite british lady (: haha, anndd a whoole a week and a half of non stop shopping + sprinkles = heaven ! seriously. fun fun fun. I love coming up here. But as we all know all good things must come to and end. Its okay, Im sure my lovely boyfriend will take me places like malibuandeatpineapplesandwatermelonswhilewatchingoldpeoplegetthrownawaybythewaveswhileplaying pusoy(: HINTTTTTHINT*
haha, I feel accomplished ! Im almost done with back to school shopping! my fall wardrobe is loooking good! i just need to figure out whether the boots I just bought is a keeper or I should replace it with ankle boots. Decisions, Desicions.

So, i shall be back home tomorrow, listening to come fly with me - michael buble` while looking out in the sunset up in the clouds, yuummm.

city city

sf was fun, i had the best tour of the city and berkeley thanks to justin and tito lito. sigh* i shouldve thought about how much colder it would be in the city, but then again LA was never cold like sf

please excuse my dear rantings.

i hate quoting cliche phrases like " I dont think im ever good enough", however guilty as pledged thats how i felt yesterday , or last night. I hate crying out in public esp when people are around , it makes me feel like a 5 year old not getting the toy she wants out of the store and instead of acting like a little lady and take it in, she goes off crying like a dramatic version of chuckie. Augh, its one attribute i really wanna get rid off. anyways, thats not the reason why i acted like a human water pipe yesterday.
Everyone else probably thought it was because they teased me on how my lovely driving was, but really it was only a bit part of it. It was a bit, because I admit, im a sensitive brat , im working on that.. but really, it was those sarcastic comments on how " she doesnt even know what red lights mean" " she cant even put a signal" added with the " why arent you this " " why arent you that"
and "why dont you say anything" about topics that i really dont find any input to because i wasnt there and gone MIA for 17 years to say anything about it. Its like Okay, please im trying . last night, it just came all up on me. It took enough guts for me to put myself in a new family i havent known my whole life, its hard. Its like they want me to fill in those 17 year gap with a single 2 weeks visit. my family is lovely, really. Its just too much pressure, or at least i feel like it is.

so i cried my eyes out, because I felt as though I wasnt good enough for my family.I have to apologize to anthony james for taking it out on him -_- sorry boyfriend. sigh* good thing , I went shopping today at stoneridge, took my mind off it for awhile, retail shopping is really therapeutic.

adventures !

me & quiana being stupid.
Im NEVER ever doing this again.

i wish ,.

there are more days than this;
perfect weather, perfect place, perfect music, perfect everything. even though anthony james spilled soda all over my sandals which almost totally killed my mood, it was still a perfect date that i will surely miss for 2 weeks <3








cruising down PCH, stopping by a viewpoint eating fresh pineapples was
the icing on the cake, + that onion ring tower ! yumm.



<3

mother dearest,

i love you, always <3
happy birthday !

i said shush girl, shut yo lips.

we only have a month left of summer !
i still need to -

1.) get my license !
2.) or fml.

3.) have a bonfire, smores included
4.) go to the beach ,

5.) finish my teen vogue 3 day seminar application ! omgomgomhgjhg.

6.) have a road trip to vegas, sb, sd, trader joes? -_-

7.) stargazing ! a mussst.
8.) a supply of new shoes + start my fall wardrobe.




9.) get to hang out will ALL the bffs, ;]
- finally get jamison his ice cream.
10.) get boyfriend his 2 year anniv gift !




well, i only did one out of the ten, thats progress.

bestfriends

xFiiNiiS1 (12:53:45 AM): i think its

xFiiNiiS1 (12:53:47 AM): hillarious

xFiiNiiS1 (12:53:49 AM): when ur mad

xFiiNiiS1 (12:53:55 AM): no onecan take u seriously

oolalaits ren (12:53:55 AM): i make a scene,

xFiiNiiS1 (12:53:56 AM): sorry =x

oolalaits ren (12:53:57 AM): -__-

oolalaits ren (12:54:02 AM): LMAOO thanks finis

xFiiNiiS1 (12:54:07 AM): i can never take u serious when ur mad

xFiiNiiS1 (12:54:09 AM): LOL

just when i thought we wasted years of good bestfriendship

oolalaits ren (12:24:35 AM): playing hard to get

oolalaits ren (12:24:36 AM): roflmao

xFiiNiiS1 (12:24:38 AM): yea

xFiiNiiS1 (12:24:40 AM): i learned from u

xFiiNiiS1 (12:24:42 AM): -__-

oolalaits ren (12:24:43 AM): LOL

xFiiNiiS1 (12:24:45 AM): u jackass


something good comes out of it .
lol

malibootay

i love these past few days because of the take outs + great bestfriends + a car with gas = one happy lauren (: also, im getting through the whooole week without buying anything , haha good for my wallet. courtney would be proud.

lol thanks for the day girlies, loved it. even though it was out of nowhere. haha, the car ride on the freeway was like..
"lets go to farmers market!"
"lets go to trader joe's!"
"lets go to malibu !"
"santa barbara!"
"san jose!"
"lets go to vegas!"
"im down"
"wait are we still going to the beach?!" LOL.






harry potter midnight show.





No road is long with good company. ~Turkish Proverb
haha, what about that trip to vegas ?
:]

hot day,

i hate hot weather especially when the pool in my compound is closed
for too much chlorine -_- blah . seriously, we broke in it about 3 times already
none of us got skin cancer.

I love him, hate him, kiss him, diss him,

its really strange how you continue to love someone even though they annoy the living crap out of you. How easily you smile when they say something dumb to try to tame your animosity towards them. sigh* anthony james clearly knows how to.


anyways, recent pictures camwhorin my poor laptop (:






best for last (:

july 4th

it all started 6 in the morning getting an annoying wake up call.
then boyfriend took me to santa barbara. played pusoy and owned almost everyone in the family reunion place , haha thanks` to emerson y. teaching me expert status >]
( even though i totally lost my patience loosing to you -_- lol )

anyways, it was really pretty and freakin cold .
but it was worth it,
thanks anthonyjames !

new start

This i guess is an upgrade, i said goodbye to literally putting my daily thoughts in my trusted journal, mainly because i got super lazy. So, i will publish my daily thoughts and ramblings in a blog, so bear with me .